The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.
When there are starving people in the world, it seems wrong that so many of us Americans eat as much for entertainment as for nourishment.
For most of life, nothing wonderful happens. If you don’t enjoy getting up and working and finishing your work and sitting down to a meal with family or friends, then the chances are you’re not going to be very happy. If someone bases his happiness or unhappiness on major events like a great new job, huge amounts of money, a flawlessly happy marriage or a trip to Paris, that person isn’t going to be happy much of the time. If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness.
Topics: Happiness, One Step at a Time
The closing of a door can bring blessed privacy and comfort — the opening, terror. Conversely, the closing of a door can be a sad and final thing — the opening a wonderfully joyous moment.
Men wake up aroused in the morning. We can’t help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, “How can he want me the way I look in the morning?” It’s because we can’t see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.
The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books – how not to eat what you’ve just learned how to cook.
- Charles Farrar Browne (Artemus Ward) American Humorist
- Sam Levenson American Humorist
- Mark Twain American Humorist
- Don Marquis American Humorist
- Don Herold American Humorist
- Bill Bryson American Humorist
- Cullen Hightower American Humorist
- Garrison Keillor American Author
- Josh Billings (Henry Wheeler Shaw) American Humorist
- Leo Rosten Russian-born American Humorist